Quick answer

Start with the smallest dilator or plug in your set, use more lubricant than feels necessary, and only move up a size after the current one inserts and rests comfortably for several sessions. Progress by comfort, not by calendar, and stop immediately at any sharp pain rather than pushing through it.

Prep your body before the first dilator

Empty your bladder and, if you choose to douche, do it 30-60 minutes before play so residual water has time to pass. Use lukewarm water only and keep the volume low; a bulb or small douche is enough. If you skip douching, that is fine too, since a normal bowel movement earlier in the day is usually sufficient. Set out your dilators or plugs, lubricant, and towels within reach so you are not interrupting yourself mid-session.

  • Trim nails and wash hands before touching any toy.
  • Warm up the room; cold muscles resist insertion.
  • Have a stop signal agreed on if a partner is involved.

Lubricant choice changes everything

The anus does not self-lubricate, so lubricant is not optional. Thicker, gel-style water-based lubricant stays put better than thin liquid formulas and is safe with silicone toys. Silicone-based lubricant lasts longer but should not be used with silicone dilators or plugs because it can degrade the surface over time. Apply lubricant to the toy, to the opening, and reapply the moment you feel drag rather than friction-free glide.

Reading dilator and plug sizes

Sets are usually labeled by diameter, not length, because diameter is what your sphincter has to accommodate. A typical progression moves in small increments, often a few millimeters at a time, and the jump between sizes matters more than the absolute number. Length is secondary for training purposes; a longer toy does not make you more advanced. If a set lists sizes in fractions of an inch, convert to millimeters so you can see the real step between each piece.

  • Measure the widest point of the toy, not the tip.
  • A flared base is mandatory on anything left in place.
  • Skip any size that jumps more than about 5 mm from your current one.

How to insert without tensing up

Breathe out as you press the tip against the opening; bearing down slightly, as if starting a bowel movement, relaxes the sphincter rather than tightening it. Aim toward the tailbone, not straight in, following the natural curve of the rectum. Insert slowly and pause at the first sign of resistance, letting the muscle adjust before continuing. Once the widest part passes the sphincter, the rest usually slides in with gentle pressure.

How long to stay at each size

A common approach is to use one size for several sessions across one to two weeks before attempting the next, but the real signal is how it feels on insertion and whether you can wear it relaxed for 10-20 minutes. If you are still clenching or counting the seconds until removal, stay where you are. Some people advance in days, others in months; both are normal.

  • Never size up in the same session you first tried the current size.
  • If a session hurts, drop back a size next time rather than quitting entirely.
  • Take a rest day if you feel sore or tender.

Cleaning up and storing your set

Wash each dilator or plug in warm water with mild soap, rinse thoroughly, and dry before storage. Check the manufacturer's guidance for your specific material, since some silicone toys can be boiled while others with motors or coatings cannot. Store pieces separately or in a pouch so they do not press against each other, and keep the whole set out of direct sunlight.

Your anal training sequence, step by step

  1. Step 1: Set up and relax: Lay out your smallest dilator or plug, thick water-based lubricant, and a towel. Use the bathroom first and give yourself 10 minutes of unhurried warm-up. Checkpoint: if you feel rushed or tense, postpone rather than force it.
  2. Step 2: Apply generous lubricant: Coat the toy and the opening, then add more at the first hint of drag. Reapply during the session instead of toughing it out. Common mistake: using too little lubricant because it feels excessive.
  3. Step 3: Insert the smallest size slowly: Breathe out, bear down gently, and angle toward the tailbone. Pause at resistance and let the muscle relax before continuing. Checkpoint: sharp pain means stop, not push.
  4. Step 4: Rest at that size: Leave the toy in place for 10-20 minutes while relaxed, or remove it once it feels easy and repeat the same size next session. Common mistake: sizing up in the same session.
  5. Step 5: Advance one size at a time: Only move up after the current size inserts and rests comfortably across several sessions. Expect small diameter jumps, not big ones. Checkpoint: if the next size will not pass, go back down and try again in a few days.
  6. Step 6: Clean and store: Wash each piece with warm water and mild soap, dry fully, and store separately. Follow the maker's care instructions for your specific material. Next step: keep a simple log of size and date so progress is visible.

Products that fit this routine

  • ElectraStim Prestige ElectraLoops Adjustable C*** Rings: ElectraStim Prestige ElectraLoops are adjustable conductive silicone rings intended for people with some experience in erotic electrical stimulation. If you already train with plugs and want to add a different sensation, these are positioned as an experienced-user electrode rather than a first toy.
  • Paradise Dream Babydoll 2pc Set: Paradise Dream Babydoll is a two-piece set in soft blue Chantilly lace and mesh with a gathered chiffon skirt, plunging unlined cups, satin trim, and a matching thong. A loose, non-restrictive layer keeps you comfortable during and after a training session, and the matching piece makes cleanup and changing simple.